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December 2015

It’s a kind of magic…

{For J}

So New Year is in a day and a half. Where you get to stare up at all the fireworks and have that kiss you have always dreamed about. When you make wishes and hope they come true. It’s a kind of magic. I talked to my crush and I told him that I see fireworks as man’s way of creating lightning he smiled and replied with almost. Then he sat there in thought and told me: “I think of it as man’s way of trying to invent magic.” I sat there flabbergasted at how such a small thought could make me think so much. Well if you think about it, everything about New Year’s Eve and New Year have a sense of magic to it. From the wishes you make to the fireworks to that kiss which makes you believe in magic. Where In actuality we experience magic every single day of our lives… thought is the magic of the mind. You create magic everywhere you go. I believe love is the biggest magic of all. It makes you believe in a happily ever after and that every day is the perfect day. in short love makes you believe in fairy tales. You might think but I’m too old for fairy tales and I’ve never experienced magic in my life. Well let me tell you this, no one is too old for a fairy tale and as Roald Dahl said: “Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.” So for this New Year I’d like you to believe in magic again… it’s inside of you, you just have to believe. Whereas for me magic is part of my daily routine. Especially when I’m with you…so here is to a new year filled with hopes and dreams may all of it come true and may 2016 be your year! So with my ending words I leave this for you… I really wish I get that New Year’s kiss. Thank you for being my inspiration. You know whom you are.

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The Boy I Used To Love

{i wrote this for some guy whom said it was not personal enough for him.}

 

So unexpectedly you showed up in my life, too perfect to be true

From that first day i knew that i loved you

You taught me so many new things

Thinking about it makes old memories sing

but time changes people

Our hearts that once fit grew out of beat

We use to be so perfect , now all we taste is defeat

So it’s time to move on, to let go of the past

Maybe in the future our paths will once cross

But for now this is my last goodbye

To the boy i used love.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

where’s my epiphany?

I’m afraid I am stuck in a rut. It seems that all the days are getting so repetitive. Waking up, feeling the urge to do well nothing. Walking the same road, having the same conversations. I had the biggest epiphany once, I realised that I wanted to be an author, someone whom inspires people but now I have come to the realisation that I have lost my epiphany or well I am losing it. Question is if I have lost it how do I get it back? There are so many people my age out there in the world who have done so many miraculous things with their lives while I’m just sitting here and my biggest problem is whether I want Pepsi or cola…every day is one long feeling of dejafu. People say everyone’s life is set up for greatness which with hard work and effort is achievable but what is my greatness? Because at the moment it feels like my life is bleak and it will amount to only more bleakness. All I want to do is make a difference, make my mark on this world, find my true voice and change lives. Do all people feel like this? Or am I making a hyperbole of a really tiny feeling? Well that’s my story for today. Goal for the next few days/weeks/months/years reclaim an epiphany!

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